What’s Underneath · digital download · upon request
For the split second before you, your family, your team, or your clients react.
That split second has a name: the Handover™. The 10 buttons let you name it, so you catch it earlier and come back faster.
The Remote Control System™ teaches you and each member of your family, team or even your clients how to take back your remote control into your hand to become the Keeper of the Remote Control (KRC).
For the person who keeps doing what they have already decided to stop doing
Find what’s underneath the button that answered first. Any of the 6 buttons that press on you can have something underneath it. What’s Underneath shows you how to find yours, so you recognise it earlier.
Digital download, upon request. 1 reply about your request, and no other email about it in between.
You’ve been upholding an unspoken rule. You never wrote it down. You couldn’t say where you learned it. Yet you follow it on autopilot.
Your manager is disappointed in you and you explain. Then you explain again with more detail. You can hear yourself doing it and you can’t break the pattern.
Or you say yes before the question has finished being asked, then regret not thinking it through, or overextending yourself.
Or you go straight to the worst version first, arrive at the meeting having already survived a disaster that did not actually happen, and wonder why you are so tired by 11am.
You’re familiar with these experiences. You can even name some of them. This is why you can describe the pattern perfectly and still do it on Thursday.
Naming it is the first step. The second step is catching what’s underneath earlier, while it’s running.
Take Settings, one of the 6 buttons that press on you: an old rule answering before you do. It’s not a mood. It runs exactly as written, in the split second before you react.
Naming the button is free. Finding out what’s underneath yours is what this is for.
What’s Underneath · digital download · upon request. Shared as part of a course, a cohort or a next-level offer.
1 reply about your request, and no other email about it in between.
Developed by Reham Nasr, Developer of the Remote Control System™, working where pressure meets behaviour since 1998.
“Since 1998 I’ve been researching one question: why do capable, values-driven people act against their own judgement under pressure? I was doing it and so were my clients.”
Reham Nasr
Naming is free. Learning is the book. Practising is the workbook. Catching the Moment is the app. That’s the Remote Control System™ in action.
Nothing honest can promise you will stop reacting. Here’s what it can promise.
What it will not do
What it will do
You will catch the Moment earlier, sometimes as it happens rather than that evening.
You will interrupt it more often than you do now.
You will miss some. When you do, you will have a way back instead of an apology you make up on the spot.
This is not therapy. It’s not a diagnosis. It’s about everyday pressures during an ordinary week. If what’s underneath is bigger than that, this is the wrong platform for you, and support is here.
The next time your manager or your mother is disappointed in you, the unspoken rule will run. It doesn’t wait for you to be ready, nor does it announce itself. It’s available on request, as part of a course, a cohort or a next-level offer. Add your name and email, and you’ll hear how to receive it.
Your details are yours. They are neither sold nor shared. Read our privacy policy and our terms.
P.S. You probably already have an idea of which unspoken rule or pattern is yours. Identifying which 2 to 3 run your day is the part that lets you catch them earlier on Tuesday.
The Remote Control System™ shared language is free, and it’s meant to be shared with the people you work with, live with, and do life with.
The whole system, stated the one way it’s always stated
The 4 events are when it happens: The Moment, The Handover™, The Gap, The Return™
The 10 buttons: 6 press on you. 4 you press.
The 1 framework sequence: Pause. Notice. Reset. Decide.
The 1 shared language.
What presses on you
What you press
The Remote Control System™ teaches you how to take back your remote control into your hand to become the Keeper of the Remote Control (KRC).
What is asked in return: name the Remote Control System™ when you share its language with anyone else.
Because an old rule is answering before you do. In the Remote Control System™ that is the Settings Button. It’s not a mood, and it’s not who you are. What’s Underneath maps 30 unspoken rules so you can find the 2 to 3 that run your week.
Settings is one of the 6 buttons that press on you in the Remote Control System™: an old rule answering before you do. It runs exactly as written, in the split second before you react. Naming the button is free. Finding out which rules are yours is what this kit is for.
30 unspoken rules in 4 groups, each written as a moment you will recognise, never a label. A way to find the 2 to 3 that run your week, the Battery Charge, and the plain words for each rule. It’s available on request, as part of a course, a cohort or a next-level offer.
No. This is not therapy and it’s not a diagnosis. It’s about everyday pressures during an ordinary week. If what is underneath is bigger than that, this is the wrong platform for you, and urgent support is one click away at the foot of this page.
New to the Remote Control System™? The book and the workbook, together.
5 minutes. 16 questions. Free.
Leading a team? Which Button Runs THE ROOM? → · Raising a family? Which Button Runs THE FAMILY? →
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The Remote Control System™ is for the everyday pressure moment, not a crisis. If you need urgent support, click here.